At the David W. Martin Law Group, our South Carolina divorce attorneys understand that when couples decide to end their marriages, they often see another side of the person they thought they knew.
Some couples can get through it with empathy and compassion. Others shut down and refuse to cooperate with the process. All personalities handle divorce circumstances differently, with one exception: The narcissist.
If you are divorcing a narcissist, you probably already know what you are in for. His or her need for admiration, lack of empathy, and extreme self-involvement is going to be on full display through each step of the divorce process.
Their sense of entitlement and belief that they are superior to others does not stop with their spouse. It will be projected on your attorney, their attorney and, once the case goes to trial — because divorcing a narcissist typically never falls short of a court date — the judge.
Narcissists believe that rules do not apply to them, and their manipulative and controlling behavior will come in waves as they attempt to control the narrative by putting their needs first.
Unfortunately, narcissists are more than difficult to negotiate with because the only thing they want is to win, which typically means being rude and abusive, while never taking responsibility for their own behavior.
If you are married to a narcissist, you know how dangerous your spouse can be. You know that all he or she wants is for you to give up. Our dedicated South Carolina divorce attorneys provide the legal, professional, and personal skills, knowledge, experience, and resources you need to say, “No.”
Chances are, your narcissistic spouse never hears the word no. Not from you. Not at work. And certainly not in his or her social circles. Now is the time to take back control of your life and learn to say no — over and over. The manipulation stops here. We will help make sure of it.
How Can I File for a Divorce When I Am Married to a Narcissist?
Our South Carolina divorce attorneys believe in honesty and transparency, which is why we explain to each of our clients who are married to a narcissist that the first stage of the divorce process is not going to be easy.
First, the narcissist will not accept the fact that you want to divorce him or her. How could you? This person believes they are the greatest human to walk the earth, so there clearly must be something wrong with you if you no longer want to be married to him or her.
Next, after he or she has had a chance to tell you what a terrible person you are, will come the threats. Threats about how you are not entitled to anything. Threats about finances. Threats about he or she will take the children. Threats about how he or she will ruin your life, and your future.
What narcissists fail to realize — because they cannot see past their egos — is that there are legal standards that exist during a South Carolina divorce. These legal standards cannot be pushed to the side to make room for your spouse’s vendetta against you for leaving the relationship.
While we cannot stop him or her from making ridiculous threats, we can help protect you from abuse.
The narcissist wants you to return to being under his or her control. And if their threats turn to violence, we will immediately ask the court for a domestic violence protective order.
Enduring the Separation Period While Still Married to a Narcissist
Getting divorced in South Carolina takes time. Unfortunately, when you are married to a narcissist, the required one-year separation period can feel like a lifetime.
During this time, our experienced family law attorneys will outline the details of the divorce, including property division, alimony, child custody, and child support details. While most couples can agree to a temporary agreement that transfers permanently once the one-year waiting period is over, narcissists will dig in — never relinquishing power.
The key to getting through the next few months is not backing down.
Again, there are legal standards that must be met, including getting the financial support you are entitled to during the separation. Typically, several months in, the narcissistic spouse will pretend to settle, but only in vague terms. He or she will want you to think they are cooperating, but this is yet another trick to manipulate the circumstances.
The more they can lull you into believing they want what is best for you, the more they can take back control of the circumstances. Trust us when we say, he or she is not being sincere.
Negotiating with the narcissist is often futile. He or she will only see you get what you want from the divorce as defeat. That means there is a high probability that your divorce case is going to trial. And when it does, your spouse’s behavior is going to be unpredictable.
Divorcing a Narcissist Requires a Fully Formed Plan to Achieve Success
At the David W. Martin Law Group, our South Carolina divorce attorneys have represented scores of men and women who are facing off against a narcissist in court.
Their spouses will do everything they can to maintain control of not just the finances and the children, but their soon-to-be-ex-spouse. The key is to never back down. We provide the emotional, physical, and legal support our clients need to take a stand and fight back.
We cannot control the actions of your narcissistic spouse. But you can control how you react to their behavior. He or she wants to upset you. They want to make you feel anxious and worried. That is why we are here. To help our clients understand that those days are behind them.
So, while he or she uses money and/or the children as leverage, we will counter with facts. The law controls whose money it is. The law controls what is regarded as the best interests of the children. The law gives our clients the power to say no, and to stand by it.
Contact Our Experienced Divorce Attorneys in South Carolina Today for Help
If you are considering a divorce, and are married to a narcissist, let our skilled family law attorneys help you put a plan in place before you file the paperwork. The more prepared you are for the fight that is coming your way, the more ready you will be to stand up to his or her behavior. We are here to help devise a divorce plan that puts you in control.